July 25, 2019

Episode 28 – Doers of the Word on Conflict

Posted in: Show Notes

How many of us can say that we love conflict?  How many of us would rather just avoid it? What if we addressed conflict in a Biblical way and saw that it has a way to glorify the Lord, serve others, and look more like Jesus?  In today’s episode, we discuss the Peace Maker’s Pledge and discuss how to handle conflict in a Biblical manner!

  • Just as we have been reconciled to God because Christ died for our sins, we believe we are called to respond to conflict in a way that looks different from the rest of the world.
  • A giant part of conflict resolution is owning your part in it
  • God calls us to be imitators of Christ, therefore, we reconcile with other people.
  • What are ways we can handle conflict resolution?
  • Just as we have been reconciled to God because Christ died for our sins, we believe we are called to respond to conflict in a way that looks different from the rest of the world.
  • A giant part of conflict resolution is owning your part in it. 
  • God calls us to be imitators of Christ, therefore, we reconcile with other people.
  • What are ways we can handle conflict resolution?
    • Go straight to the person.
      • Don’t go “process” with other people.
      • Don’t bring it up as a prayer request to a group. 
      • Recruit other people to be on “your side” or justify why you feel the way you do.
      • Press past the temptation to be passive aggressive.
    • Deal with it immediately.
      • Don’t hold it in and grow in bitterness.
      • Don’t try to “push past it”.
    • Pray for the person you have conflict with.
      • Don’t spend your time slandering the person or venting on social media. 
  • Where people are, conflict is.
  • How can we be peacemakers as Christ calls us to be peaceable with all? 
    • Mathew 5:9
      • Jesus tells us to be peacemakers.
    • Luke 6:27
      • We are called to respond in an opposite way of the rest of the world.
    • Paul addresses conflict within many of the churches he writes letters to. 
  • The Peace Maker’s Pledge
    • See conflict as an opportunity to:
      • Glorify God.
        • Trusting Him.
        • Obeying Him.
        • Imitating Him.
      • Serve other people.
        • By helping to bare their burdens.
        • By confronting them in love.
      • Grow to be like Christ.
        • By confessing our sin.
        • Turning from our old ways. 
        • Pilippians 4:8–Is it worthy of praise? 
    • Get the log out of your own eye
      • Mathew 7:5
      • Two types of logs:
        • Is this conflict a result of me being critical, being negative, or being overly sensitive? 
        • Is this conflict a result or the sinful actions or words I have committed?
    • Confess
      • Address everyone involved.
        • Proverbs 28:13
      • Avoid and’s, but’s, and maybe’s. 
      • Admit specifically both attitudes and actions.
      • Apologize.
      • Accept the consequences. 
      • Alter your behavior. 
        • Ephesians 4:22-24
      • Ask for forgiveness.
  • What causes conflict between us?  Our own sinful desires.
    • James 4:1-4
    • Mathew 15:18
  • How do we go to our sister/brother and tell them what conflict exists between the two of you? 
    • If you can answer “no” to the following questions, then the offense should be overlooked.
      • Is the offense seriously dishonoring God?
      • Has it permanently damaged a relationship?
      • Is it seriously hurting other people?
      • It is seriously hurting the offender themselves? 
    • If you answered “yes” to the above questions, then you have to address the conflict. 
      • Pray for humility and wisdom as you enter the conversation.
      • Choose the right time and place.
      • Assume the best about the other person.
      • Listen carefully.
        • Proverbs 18:13
      • Speak only to build others up.
        • Ephesians 4:29
      • Ask for feedback from the other person. 
        • “How are you feeling?”
        • “Is there a way I could have done this better?”
      • Recognize your limits.
        • Romans 12:14
    • If having the conversation one-on-one doesn’t work, bring other trusted believers into the conversation. 
  • Colossians 3:13 says, “bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also much forgive.”

We hope that you are encouraged to go put these steps into action within your own lives and relationships. God has given us such an opportunity to glorify Him through the hard moments that arise in our lives.  We pray for you as you seek Him through it!

-The OHT team 

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